self/image, trans/image

On discovery of my fear of narcissism.

By looking at the definition, this is not it. The question remains, why is there a strong self-censoring moment at the occasion of self-perception that arouses something akin to erotism?

Current fixation is a name: Prince Lucija. It goes fine well with a self/image, with a selfie:

"[...T]he image is flesh of the world. It can never be fully contained."

  • Amelia Jones, SELF/IMAGE

This is her, above.
It is a women in me that I adore.

Struggling with these feelings
that are pulling me back,
that are forbiding me this self-adoration,
as an immoral act.

The research reveals:

Narcissism is characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy for others, a need for excessive admiration, and the belief that one is unique and deserving of special treatment.

I realised it feels exciting if someone uses female forms when talking about me.


...to be continued